Bonjour j'ai une rédaction d'anglais a faire

Sujet : Ecrire un recit policier a l'aide d'illustrations

J'ai écrit ma rédaction et pouvez vous me dire si il y a des fautes d'orthograque et si la grammaire est correct ? Merci d'avance :)

The detective John Goodface, in afternoon was watching over two men in a car park at London with magnifying glasses. The professor Helmer was the more smaller than the man in front of him and he was wearing a coat brown . The other man was Charles Vorp, director of a large company. He had appealed at John Goodface for investigating on a society whom him was doing competition for find confidentials and compromising informations. Helmer had just loaded to bring the bag containing the informations on the society. It had risked because nobody should know Charles did call a detective.

Althought John was watching over Helmer and Charles and the surrondings for to make sure the transaction was spending right, few minutes later the start of them conversation, a man appeared in front of the parking. He opened a trap door and he placed a detonator in. They had been spot ..

Suddenly John saw him he look suprised and puzzled. He ran in a park car for save the professor Helmer. The car park exploded but the three men escaped a murder attempt thanks to John Goodface and because they had flung on a inflatable playground.

The man must has been the employee of the company where Goodface investigate, he didn't want Charles has acces at informations confidantials on the society

One day after the murder attempt the director of a competition company and the man whom did the murder attempt was on a prison.

2

Réponses

2013-01-06T15:06:18+01:00

Je suis anglaise alors cela est facile

the detective John Goodface was watching over two men in a car park one afternoon with a magnifying glass. The professor Helmer was the smaller of the two and was wearing a brown coat. The other man Charles Vorp was the director of a large company. He was appealed at John Goodface for investigating a competion company who were finding confidentials and compromising informations. Helmer had the bag which contained the informations on the society. It was risky because nobody can know Charles called a dectective.

... They had been spoted...

... He ran in a car park to save the professor. ... the three man escaped the attempt of murder.. and because they had jumped on a bouncy house.

... which Goodface had investigatehe did not want Charles to have acces to the confidantials informations ...

The next day the director of the competion company and the attempt murdurer where in jail

 

J'espere que je tes aider chaque fois que j'ai mi ... cela il veut dire que j'ai pas recopier car c'etait juste

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  • Modératrice Junior
2013-01-06T16:12:35+01:00

The detective John Goodface, was watching in afternoon over two men in a car park at London with a magnifying glasses. The professor Helmer was the more smaller than the man in front of him and he was wearing a coat brown . The other man was Charles Vorp, director of a large company. He had appealed at John Goodface for investigating on a society whom him was doing competition for find confidentials and compromising informations. Helmer had just loaded to bring the bag containing the informations on the society. It had risked because nobody should know Charles did call a detective.

Althought John was watching over Helmer and Charles and the surrondings for to make sure the transaction was spending right, few minutes later the start of them conversation, a man appeared in front of the parking. He opened a trap door and he placed a detonator in. They had been spot ..

Suddenly John saw him he look suprised and puzzled. He ran in a park car for save the professor Helmer. The car park exploded but the three men escaped a murder attempt thanks to John Goodface and because they had flung on a inflatable playground.

The man must has been the employee of the company where Goodface investigate, he didn't want Charles has acces at informations confidantials on the society

The next day the director of a competition company and the man whom did the murder attempt was on a prison.

 

Non tu n'avais pas trop de fautes de grammaires et d'orthographes voilà j'espère t'avoir aider :-D