Pouvez vous me dire s'il y a des fautes dans ma rédaction svp:
It was a Wednesday, children's day, it was almost 16:30 and everyone was at the park because the weather was sunny. We sat on a park bench with Laura, my daughter. In front of there was my boy, Top who played slide.
All of a sudden, we heard a loud noise, tyres crunching. Followed by sudden braking. There was very footsteps.
Our bench, we could see the accident, saw a body bumped into a car. There was a men yell at each other, was driving. He was very upset.
The people run to the men lying on the ground to try to help.
Other called the fire departement. Upon their arrival they moved to a large plastic bag. There was a lot of blood drops on plastic. Finally, they moved the injured person on the wheelchair and they shipped. Usually it does not happen this kind of accident. Here it is very quiet.

2

Réponses

2014-04-25T10:38:41+02:00
Non il n'y en a pas et c une très bonne rédaction.
Tu es en quel classe ?
collège mais ma mère ma dit qui n'y en avait pa
Je vous fais confiance alrs
2014-04-25T10:40:27+02:00
Bonjour
j'ai traduit ton texte il n'y a pas de fautes ( d' après mes connaissances )
d'ailleurs ton histoire est superbe ! :)
mais pour les fautes essaye de vérifier toi je ne suis pas sure

It was on a Wednesday, children's day, it was almost 16:30 and everyone was at the park because the weather was sunny. We sat on a park bench with Laura, my daughter. Right in front of where we sat was my boy, Top who played on the slide.
All of a sudden, we heard a loud noise, the screeching sound of tyres. Followed by a sudden braking. We heard many footsteps.
From our bench, we could see the accident and saw that someone had bumped into a car.
There were men yelling at each other and especially to the driver who was very upset.
People at once run towards the man lying on the ground to try to help him.
Others called the fire department. Upon their arrival they moved the injured person onto a large plastic bag. There were lots of blood drops on the plastic. Finally, they moved the injured person on a wheelchair and speeded away.
It came across my mind that usually this kind of accident does not happen.
In the park it was still very quiet.
Ca te convient ?
merci beaucoup mais tu es sur ? en quel classe tu es ?