Bonjour demain j'ai un DM en anglais il faut raconter une histoire qui fait peur pouvez-vous me corriger les fautes svp voici mon texte :When I was a child I went with my friend Emma in England. She is elegant, black-eyed, long-haired. I like her because she is very funny and polite. We were visited my grand-mother, she lives in a haunted castle. She is intelligent and generous. She has brown-eyed , long haired . My grand-mother was very happy to we see. My grand-father was went in the city.
My grand-mother having a shower and Emma and me we was in the kitchen. I opened window because it was very hot in the kitchen, when suddenly I saw someone walking along gravel path the garden around midnight. First I heard a door creaking. I heard someone coughing the corridor. We were terrified. I whispered:
"Oh my god, what are we going to do ? "
When the killer opening the door to kitchen Emma and me we had scream but it was that grand-father. We were relievied. What a relief !!!

1
ok mercii ya que ça comme fautes
Oui il me semble j'ai corrige ce que je trouvais évident
ok merciiiiiiiii beaucoup mais vous ne voyer pas d'autre fautes vous etes sur ?
Ah si désolée 2 petites : opening the door of the kitchen / Emma and me we had scream but it was my grand- father
mrc

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2014-02-07T09:21:48+01:00
When I was a child I went with my friend Emma to England (to go to somewhere). She is elegant, black-eyed, long-haired. I like her because she is very funny and polite. We were visited my grandmother (pas de trait d'union) who lives in a haunted castle. She is intelligent and generous. She is brown-eyed , long-haired . My grand-mother was very happy to see us. Unfornatunately, my grand-father wasn't here, he had gone to the city.
My grandmother was having a shower and Emma and I ( I plutôt que me car tu es le sujet du verbe, me est utilisé quand tu es l'objet du verbe) were in the kitchen. I was opening the window (article car il s'agit d'un fenêtre bien précise, celle de la cuisine) because it was very hot in the kitchen, when suddenly I saw someone walking along gravel path in the garden around midnight.

NB ==> note la construction : I was doing something, when I saw someone = j'étais en train de faire ... quand soudain je vis quelqu'un. Le forme prétérit + ING est utilisé pour exprimer le fait que tu étais en train de faire quelque chose.
Dès que tu peux utilisé "en train" en français, en anglais ça devient "verbe + ING". Ex: I'm doing an exercise now (je suis en train de faire un exercice maintenant). Tomorrow at noon, I will be having a lunch with my mother (demain à midi,  je serai en train de manger avec ma mère). Yesterday I was running in the street when I saw my friend (hier j'étais en train de courir quand je vis mon ami)

First, I heard a door creaking. I heard someone coughing in the corridor. We were terrified. I whispered:
"Oh my god, what are we going to do ? "
When the killer opened the kitchen door, Emma and me we screamed but it was only grandfather. We were relievied. What a relief !!!